Ok. This week I am presented with an interesting dilemma. It is also the week that The Ex may have to realise that there is more to being a father than getting to see his daughter when it suits him. I am rather annoyed right now, but that shall pass. And to be fair, it is allegedly something medical. But in all fairness, if he’s known about it for a while, he could have rescheduled the appointment, surely? For his daughter’s sake? Oh wait. Of course. That’s putting someone else first. And let us not forget that he, and everyone else in his family, are incapable of putting anyone before themselves, their own children included. Grrr.
Anyway, The Toddler normally sees her father on Saturdays. He can’t make it this week because of some medical appointment. That’s what he told me anyway. I didn’t ask questions, as what he does with his time really isn’t any of my business. But he did allude to this last week, to which I said something about rescheduling. He had asked about meeting midweek, bearing in mind he does know that The Toddler attends nursery every weekday. Hmm. Anyway, I of course told him we couldn’t, because of nursery. And anyway, why should we have to give up our lives to suit him? He could have easily rescheduled his appointment. Surely? Or maybe I’m missing something. All I know is that I’m going to have one grouchy toddler on my hands when I have to give her the news. As she is getting older, she now knows that she sees Dad on Saturdays. She knows that Saturday is the day after the last day of nursery for the week (Friday to you and me). She will be cross and upset, and will not care in the slightest about excuses. Oh the joy. But next week is half-term. And so she may get to see her father midweek. I do wish he’d learn to put her first. It was one of the many things we argued about before I left him. It’s also something he claims that he does do. Hmm. Yeah.
But this whole thing has reminded me of a bizarre incident from a few years back. Me and The Ex had only recently moved in together, during my final year of university. He’d just been offered a promotion at work, for which he would have to complete a three day course, and pass an exam. He called his mother (Matriarch) with this excellent news, putting the call on speakerphone for whatever reason. But I was astounded by Matriarch’s response. There was no “Well done son, that’s great!” Instead, it was “What dates?” The Ex dutifully relayed the information, and she replied with, “Well you can’t do that. You’ve a dentist appointment…” I could not believe that she was proposing he miss out on an opportunity for promotion for a dentist appointment. I could just imagine what his former boss’s response would have been to that. Impressed she would not have been. Least of all because the dentist appointment could be rescheduled. The promotion course and exam of course could not be. He went for the promotion though, when I pointed out that the appointment could be rescheduled.
It’s small wonder therefore that he feels unable to rearrange this Saturday’s appointment for the sake of his daughter. But I can’t help but wish he would learn to sort his priorities. Is it wrong for me to expect him to put The Toddler first?
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